PrinceofNothingReviews: Mechamorphosis; A joyless descent into the worst excesses of the d20 system.

In reviewing the body of RPGdom, sometimes one is blessed. One discovers a work that is sleek, elegant, beautiful, poetic and unique. Sometimes by merely perusing its pages one’s own home game is improved, no matter how slightly, forevermore. They whisper that beyond the grey nothingness wherein lie the merely mediocre or terrible games (Arrows of Indra to name but one entirely coincidental example that I just came up with at the top of my head and that is in no way to be taken as a slight againt a certain Uruguayan rpgdesigner that has recently endorsed Age of Dusk as the blog that best highlights his every utterance yet has neglected to show up to the celebratory Age of Dusk Prom Event even though I had bought him a plane ticket as well as a beautiful skirt and assless chaps, leaving me bereft of a Queen of the Prom and thus the subject of mockery from my peers), there is a pitch-black void, an anti-RPGDom wherein each work of sublime quality has a horrid mirror-image. An inverted nightmare of rulesbloat and terrible fiction that actively removes some of the joy one takes in running rpgs and makes every home game slightly less perfect, no matter how slight. Today we will approach that dreaded anti-land and travel beyond it into unknown regions. Mechamorphosis is a queer thing, a transcendent rpg-like object that encompasses the whole spectrum of possibly great and anti-land in one unfathomable combination.

Mechamorphosis is the last in the Horizon series of mini-games for the d20 system.  As can be gleaned from my loggorheaic (or gonoerrheaic) opening paragraph, it sucks, or maybe it is brilliant. I am not encouraging you buy this ever. If you are going to buy it don’t and send the money to me instead. I need it for booze. Sobreity and Mechamorphosis do not go well together.

Uh shit, the actual game. Mechamorphosis is Transformers with the serial numbers filed off that runs on the d20 system. Suprise suprise, you play fully customisable transformers. It is 90% crunch and 10% useless transformers fluff with the serial numbers filed off. I hate it and I also stand in awe of it. It comes across not as something to be played but the sterile end-result of a rules-heavy point buy system breeding program. It twitches grotesquely, yet its malformed limbs and hot-housed biology hold a certain alien alure.

Let us begin at character generation, because more then 80% of the book is character generation rules. Full credit where it is due, you can play as just about fucking anything (you will not, you will not play this, no one will play this). If you are one of the denizens of anti-land that has always found the D20 system a bit too constraining and limiting and in need of less streamlining, your prayers have been answered. Since at least one person involved with Mechamorphosis had actually read it, they made the sensible decision of rescaling the D20 system for Giant robots. That means that despite the fact that you may begin play as a first level robot that can turn into a tank and you can crush buildings with your fists, your starting Str may still be described as 10. But it is a robot 10, with humans having about a 1 on average on this new str scale. Same goes for stuff like hit points. Humans are sort of there as window dressing, but the main action is to focus on the Mechamorphs. For some reason a starting mechamorph is given a level adjustment of +6 but since there is no way the Mechamorph is compatible with anything else barring serious rescaling they may as well not have bothered.

I always found the random rolling of ability scores to be jarring in a game as carefully balanced as d20, which is why point buy made so much sense. Mechamorphosis has extrapolated that spergian desire for order and harmony to ludicrous proportions. Before one decides upon one’s mechamorph, one must make a list of 1 to 5, 1 meaning most important and 5 meaning least important, and rank according to importance, ability scores, alternate shape (and starting size), starting bonus form feats, special abilities and starting gear. And now we are just getting started.

Alternate shape may be a vehicle, an inanimate object, a mechanical dinosaur or animal, a weapon and a fucking building (yes, the rules have an option for having one guy turning into a fortress complete with turrets that the other guys can subsequently man and fight with, with the fortress providing cover and aid another actions where neccesary). I cannot stress the ridiculous amount of customization options, hardpoints that come with alternate forms, and alt-form feats that can be used to further improve this process etc. etc. These options alone would be enough to overwhelm most casual player but of course we need to select a class. Mechamorphosis is going to give you options and it is going to shove those options down your throat so in addition to feats and skills you may fully customise and select class features every 2 levels. AC bonuses are included in class progression to offset the merciful lack of expanded magic item esque equipment at later levels.

The first class is immediately the most baffling and complex one. The Controller is a class whose class features are based around having 1 or more autonomous sub-components in the form of animal companions or even humanoids, and various abilities that allow one to share special abilities, feats and other malarky with said animal companions. With additional class features, one’s humanoid companions may be given class levels. Throw in ranged aiding others as a free action and you have the strangest support class I have ever seen. Unfathomable and impossible to gauge. Naturally, one cannot take a controller with a humanoid companion with levels in controller, that would be cheating.  The rest is your Scientist, a tech/medic monkey whose ability to create and repair advanced mechamorph tech is pretty much essential on earth, since you do not have a store. A scout which is a sort of ranger rogue and the soldier which is the most customisable example of a fighter class I have ever seen. You know how a fighter gets a bonus feat every 2 levels in d20, just imagine customisable class features every level you don’t get one. Jesus wept.

Fantasy Flight must have looked at the work and at least decided some streamlining would be neccesary to offset the staggering amount of options available to even 1st level character so skills have been streamlined as is the norm for horizon supplements. A lack of healing potions means the Build/Repair skill in combination with the medic class feature does all the heavy lifting healing-wise, and since you are fucking robots you can even be rebuilt if someone destroys you, neccesitating a Computer Use skill alongside the repairing. The Feat selection is predictably expansive, with a plethora of feats ranging from the relatively mundane +1 to AC (an insane advantage for a humble feat) or accelerate 50% faster while in vehicle form to the more esoteric feats that allow one to manipulate objects as though one were smaller or to swim underwater without sinking to the bottom.

Naturally all this is waaaaay too simple for Transformers genre emulation. We must also have special powers, ranging from a set of mundane spellike abilities that could conceivably be produced with advanced technology to the batshit insane mechamerge power that allows multiple mechs to combine into a giant super robot of death. While I hate Mechamorphosis and I would not play it under pain of death its thoroughness is utterly beyond reproach. What happens if you are in a mechamerge and you wish to take control of the giant robot of death? Of course there are rules for this also.

Equipment again blurs the line between class feature and item, every character has a number of slots that allow for the installation of upgrades of a certain power level. Some of them are extremely great and some of them only work in Alt form so an additional layer of gameplay is grafted on where there were already several. Aquiring tech is next to fucking impossible on earth, so it has to either be built from scratch or found/taken from some other unfortunate robotic asshole wandering the earth. An assortiment of robotic firearms are provided but these are, sadly, nothing special, mostly what one would expect. A few notes on improvised weaponry spice up an otherwise ho-hum section.

Where would we be without the driving and flying rules? Do you remember the driving section from Redline, my first review, where I praised it for its comprehensive approach and utility but bemoaned its density? Now imagine that driving section expanded to flying, yet paradoxically shorter. There is no way the D20 system with its obsession with positioning and grids can co-exist with aerial combat at mach 5 whilst mechs on the ground take potshots using this rule section and you are better off just handwaving the damned thing if you plan on running the type of shit that will inevitably happen. I mean, you might sucker one of your players into playing a robot that can turn into a refridgerator and another one that turns into a golf cart but the next logical step is always going to be Alt-form Fighter Jet. Hideous potential for Abuse! Remember the collision rules in Redline? These still apply. And are dependent on size. And you can select that size. And Alt-form space battlecruiser. And power-dive fuckers from orbit.

Now I know what Y’all are thinking. Prince, this game does not give players any agency during combat. Mechamorphosis provides…us another fucking sub-system. Every character has a number of Nexus (think Energon) points equal to their level that may be added as one-time bonuses to damage, AC, DR/-, Saving throws or ignore Fatigue. Also robots need to Stasis at least 4 hours per day to recharge these Nexus points. Temporary 24-hour Nexus cells (like batteries of floating modifiers) may be created so points may be borrowed to others at a 2:1 ratio and even extracted from crude human earth tech like oil fields or nuclear reactors. The only modification to the combat rules is the addition of a critical hit system where Transformers can sustain damage to certain components like their core, sensors, gyroscopes or even their core. It is a simple and beautifully functional subsystem that takes up less then a page.

Take fucking note, no rules provided anywhere for human combatants, human tanks, human choppers and whatnot. Atrocious. I would expect that and a list of materials or even buildings since one would expect at least some of the combat to take place in those, or perhaps on the Hoover Dam or near a Nuclear powerplant. I can get the lack of space but fuck you, scrap the bullshit campaign setting, everyone who plays this knows what Transformers is about, condense it to 3 pages, done.

The campaign setting itself is the campaign setting of Transformers with the serial numbers filed off. That is acceptable when genre-emulating but I am annoyed because they missed a great opportunity to make shit exciting. They tried though, I’m not sure how much is cribbed from Transformers, probably everything, to make it sound halfway plausible. It is good enough to run a game of not-transformers, even if you have not seen them. For those of you not in the know (this includes myself), a quick dismissively sarcastic recap;

Years ago a bunch of robots took control of all the other robots on robot-land after the great primordial reactor broke down and the evil robots said they had a power source. The evil robots lorded over everyone and made them build ships for fixing the power problem and getting more shit. Finding shit was dangerous and a lot of ships got blowed up by white holes but the evil robots still give everyone power. The animal robots found out soilent Nexus is people and were given the option of either gtfoing or face extinction. The animal robots decided to split but the evil robots played a trick on them and assaulted them as their ships left the robot planet and the animal robots drove into a white hole, followed by the evil robot emperor and his flagship, but not the rest of his fleet, who was not so fucking retarded. In the absence of their first robot emperor, the evil robots became even bigger dicks and rather then risk robot civil war, a bunch of good robots led by a guy who knew white holes were actually sort of like wormholes, fled robotplanet. Of the nine ships, one makes it, allegedly. Then we get more backstory about what happens to the robots on earth and a general that is convinced they are a menace. Why is this not an NPC with stats?
The campaign should start here, with the robot players alone and uncertain of how many of their comrades live, cut off from supplies and chased by filthy humans. Moving on. A huge jerk robot from the evil robots, sick with being the robot emperors bitch, follows them after figuring out white holes can be travelled and the first robot emperors ship with all his cool Nexus draining shit is still there. Not-megatron infiltrates URTH, finds old egyptian robot relics and runs into the second group and they have a tussle. Why is this in the history section and not the campaign? The good robots find a garage and repair shit and befriend two humans. And also an evil corporation gets involved to an expedition to antarctica but the good robots foil it and discover the animal robots are still alive. DUM DUM DUM. Why is this not an adventure? The good robots team up with part of the animal robots to fight the evil robots, also a cave with seven new nexus generators is discovered, thus the player characters. That last conceit is great, since it caps the number of new robots that you can just blithedly introduce. Any GM actually insane enough to run this shit would do best with creating a list of protagonists and antagonists beforehand and keep track of who has been permakilled, since one cannot just introduce new robots willy nilly. TLDR we finally get a list of looming threats. Predictably, the general of a hundred thousand year old robot empire and a cutthroat buisness man go well together and make an alliance, there are hints of a traitor to the evil robots still being in contact with the even more evil robot empire, the general has been fired and is now in charge of a private military corporation with super technology that can pierce robot damage reduction (all robots have DR against non-robot weaponry) that is clearly not funded by the Obama Administration Evil robots and also something about Aliens.

As a last excercise, I shall generate 4 a 5th level characters using Mechamorphosis to illustrate my problem.

The first shall be the simplest one, he shall be a scout and a fighter jet, since there is simply no way we are going to have him not be a fighter jet. In true mechamorphosis fashion, we shall name him Sunschreech. We must first decide upon Sunschreech’s priorities and since we want to give him an Alt-form fighter Jet and the minimum priority for that is 3 (5 being highest), we put alt-form at 3. The scout section mentions special abilities are also a big deal for the scout class, and ability scores also. We might ignore all of those. We take form feats at 4, netting us 8 extra form feats. At this point we are in for a penny and decide upon a 5 for ability score, netting us 36 points to distribute, as well as a 2 for special abilities and a 1 for starting gear, Sunscreech shall start off poorly, a risque choice given the number of weapon slots and tech slots he employs.

Very well. Sunscreech shall be a huge coward that almost never fights in melee and is also thoroughly unlikeably since Scouts are by defenition anti-social fuckwits. His Cha will be 7 and his Starting strength will be 11, leaving us with 34 more points. Int shall be at least 14 and Con 12, leaving us with 24 more points. Given the fact not many things in Mechamorphosis trigger Will saves, we mirthfully put Wisdom on 8 and starting Dex on 20 since Dex is the god stat and it shall be first among equals. Unfortunately, a starting Dex of 22 would have cost us all 36 points, thus 20 seems a logical concession. (Edit we alter it to Int 12 Wis 13 Con 10 Str 10 so I may take a single stupid feat).

Str 11 Dex 20 Con 12 Int 14 Wis 8 Cha 7. Ah the minmax. Unfortunately, our Jetfighter alternate shape makes our normal shape Gargantuan, which is somewhat detrimental to our AC  and attack (-4) and levies a hefty penalty on our stealth skill (-16). We sigh regretfully as we change our alternate shape to Attack Chopper, reducing our size to Large and letting us keep most of our alt-form weapon slots and tech slots at the cost of our top speed. 227 miles per hour will have to suffice for Starscreech. Or will it?

We still have 8 starting form feats. Starscreech is going to be a pretty bitchin chopper, so we give him Improved Acceleration (x2 for a hundred percent boost and allowing us to reach top speed in 2 rounds), we will not take improved speed since a 20% speed increase is never going to make a difference unless we happen to encounter another chopper, he will either outrun or be horribly outrun, Mounted Weapons so we may fire all of our mounted weapon slots even while we are in primary form (we need multishot feats to do so for each seperate weapon though :(), and of course we take Armour Boost 5 times for a total +5 to AC.

Starschreech is not powerful enough so he gets his special ability. We disregard silent Image in favour of Shield of Faith i mean Nexus shield, netting him 1 min/level of +2 AC +1/6 levels if push comes to shove. Sadly, our aenemic budget restricts us to simple firearms only, therefore a Blaster Carbine with only a paltry 1d10 points of damage output but a very decent 150 foot range increment. Nothing will ever touch us unless it is a fighter jet so it will all be fine.

Can you imagine the hours of time it would take to go through this process to stat up even 10 fucking transfaggots (I mean the robot kind)? It would be absurd. Anyway. Sunschreech is a Scout of 5th level. He begins with a single starting feat and he gets 8+int modifier starting skills x4 at first level. We are simply going to add 4 to each of his starting skills because 10 skills. In order of importance; Pilot, Acrobatics, Concentration, Disguise, Fine Manipulation, Computer Use, Build/Repair Simple, Senses, we ignore Interaction since Starschreech is a massive humanophobe and doesn’t believe Animorphs are a real alt-form, sighing, we settle with Athletics, and we sink points into all of those until we reach 5th level.

We have yet to pick his feats, 2, 1 for 1st and 1 for 3rd level, we increase his dex by 1 at 4th level and we may also select bonus feats at 1, 2 and 4.
The first bonus feat we take is Combat Pilot so we may roll pilot skills to avoid taking damage in alt form, useable a number of rounds equal to our Dex modifier. The first feat we take is Skill Focus (Pilot). Ready Gunner will be our second bonus feat and allow us to draw our weapon as a free action and reduce reloading time. Third feat will be Multishooting so we can fire two weapons at the same time. 4th level nets us another bonus feat so we shall take another armour boost for a total of +6 AC (we assume we do not posses 3 weapons yet, otherwise we will keep stocking up on multishooting until we have enough for 8 weapon mounts). I have ignored the rapid shot feat tree which can apparently be combined with range weapons. Shit. We get rid of Ready gunner and the multishooting feat so we can have Point Blank Shot and Rapid Shot since they are too good not to take. An alternate take is to simply dump all your feats in Armour Boost since there is no reason not too unless you play a Controller or Scientist Character. This game is a mess.

Did you really expect us to be finished? We still have 3 class abilities to select. After a moment of indecision, we do a confused double take and figure out the Stealth skill is not actually a scout class skill which makes no sense so we ignore that, so we go back to our skill selection and replace Disguise with Stealth. We pick Evasion (because it is too good not to pick), Deceptive 1 (allowing us to use Stealth for Disguise when morphing whatever that means) and Sneak Attack 1 for 1d6 extra damage. Whew. Imagine doing this for every NPC you stat up.

A character stat block would look something like this.

Sunscreech
Large Doucherobot
HD: 5d8 (24 hp)
Int: +5
BAB: +3
Speed: 30ft. or 240 ft. (perfect maneuverability flight)
Attacks: Carbine + 7 ranged (1d10) or +5/+5 ranged. + Sneak Attack 1d6.
Or Unarmed + 2 melee 1d8 dam. (preferably use some sort of improvised club for 1d8 points).
AC: 25 (+11 Insight, +5 Dex, -1 Size)
Special Abilities: Up to 5 minutes of Nexus shield (+2 deflection bonus to AC). 5 Nexus Points. Sneak Attack +1d6.
Special Defences: Evasion
Abilities: Str 10 Dex 21 Con 10 int 12 wis 13 cha 7
Skills: Athletics +8, Acrobatics +13, Computer Use +9, Concentration +8, Fine Manipulation +13,  Pilot +16, Senses +9  Stealth +9.
Feats: Armor Boost (x6), Combat Pilot, Improved Acceleration (x2), Mounted Weapons, Point Blank Shot, Rapid Shot, Skill Focus (Pilot).
Saves: Fort +1, Ref +9, Will +1
Equipment: Fuck.

So there you have it. As a stat-optimisation wankathon it is delicious and full of undiscovered hidden potential. For example, Having immense size increases your unarmed damage to 4d8 at the paltry cost of -16 to hit and AC. Can this be used to one’s advantage somehow? As an actual game it possesses crippling deficiencies, notable stats for NPCS are missing, the setting starting point could have been more interesting and the game is so complex as to be very challenging if not impossible to actually to run. My recommendation is that you only attempt this feat if you are the sort of power-hungry rollplayer the WoD-faggots sneer at during their bi-monthly wicca gatherings and even then, only if you are a fat rollplayer just to be on the safe side.

Pros: Enough character creation options to facilitate all but the most unlikely of transformers.
Cons: Insufficient focus on the campaign setting in favour of endless character creation options. Poor implementation. Lack of enemies/interesting NPCs. Lacklustre rules for aerial and vehicle combat. Likely to be horribly broken/susceptible to min/maxing.

Final Verdict: I’d rather watch those godawful movies again. 3 out of 10.

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9 thoughts on “PrinceofNothingReviews: Mechamorphosis; A joyless descent into the worst excesses of the d20 system.

  1. “Fantasy Flight…”

    I had heard everything I needed to hear once this had hit the table. See that name on a product, know ye full well that it will have a surfeit of mechanics with which to pleasure yerself, and be largely bereft of charm in any region beyond this.

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    1. Von you ignorant Slut. Grimm actually removed mechanics and most of the other supplements and is full of charm, and Disciples of the Dark Gods for Dark Heresy is a glorious masterpiece so good that I actually applaud its entire first chapter consisting of nothing but in game fiction and fake documents.

      I will hear of additional offenders beyond Mechamorphosis after letting it be known that Anima Beyond Fantasy does not count in any way shape since that would weigh the burden of proof so heavily in your favour it renders the argument nonvalid via absurdity. I shall peruse your website for evidence to support this hatespeech.

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      1. Disciples of the Dark Gods is a filthy sinner and your liking the rest of it does not redeem its sins.

        WFRP.3 was sort of fun but dear lord there’s a lot of counters, cards and other faff involved in it. I couldn’t run it and I think ill of a game that needs one of those little tiny organiser things that sane people use for nuts, bolts, nails, screws etc.

        Also: Twilight Imperium. All fourteen terrible fucking hours of it. Fantasy Flight are a byword for board games that you can’t play to conclusion between getting off work and last orders at the local hostelry.

        And don’t slut-shame me. I’m the living saint of the OSR, remember?

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      2. Disciples of the Dark Gods is the Delilah of Sinners; seductive, proud, beautiful and useful on a table.

        I never checked out WFRP3. I saw cards and decks and I turned about and ran for the nearest hill. I have yet to decide between 2 and 1. Now that you mention it, i have reason to suspect the new Grimm is also an unplayable mess of stats where a rules-light whimsical system was required. I have seen Twilight Imperium but this calls back a recent evening with lofty ambitions of playing Diplomacy while I was the only person to have read it and played it, games like that require a huge investment.

        A saint ye are. But you will learn to hate yet. Fear not. It is coming.

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  2. This reminds me of that thing you get after the successfully aborted product of a pack of min-maxgremlins making non-consensual sweet love to a max level Diablo character is further incubated on a South-Korean chocolate chip cookie richly imbued with the man juice of a pathological Pathfinder power gamer.
    Only with less focus on equipment. What’s the fun of min-maxing if you can’t plan out what the optimal gear is for characters at level x?

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    1. [min-max gremlins]

      The term min-max gremlins is hereby culturally appropriated/colonised by Age of Dusk. What was it you said again? Here you are just casually going through the character creation process hoping to get a wholesome family fun space opera game and then you hit that one supplement and then suddenly…the min-max gremlins pop out. Although there are games that set out to be character-optimisation wankathons from the get-go, the term min-max gremlins invokes an unwanted presence, lurking behind a facade of wholesome genre emulation fun, and you might be on to something there.

      [Equipment]
      I didn’t do equipment enough credit. All you need is a Scientist with his class abilities focused on Build/Repair Complex and a willingness to burn XP like there is no tomorrow and you can literally equip your pcs with anything you can scrounge together. You will also need a repair bay though. I assume larger weaponry causes more damage but the game is unclear if that goes for ranged weapons, if so, an immense character with an area of effect weapon should do the trick. There are various sensor and defence systems you can throw on your alterante vehicle form hardpoints if you are feeling sassy. A drawback of weapon, building and animal forms seems to be a lack of equipment and weapon hardpoints, which is puzzling.

      I will concede 3.5’s magic item-construction make-you-own-flavour-icecream rules would have beefed up Mechamorphosis’s min-max gremlin levels with regards to the equipment section, not that it needs it.

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