Announcing the Winners of the 2021 PrinceofNothingPresents No Artpunk Contest.

The entries are in, the reviews have been done. Now remains only the judgement. It is with excruciating heartache that I must select only eight of the splendid entries that you have sent in. I have rent my cheeks, smeared ashes in my hair and weep blood, beating my chest with my fist, thinking of the countless worthy entries that must now settle for a lesser glory. You have made me all proud to be a Prince of this OSR. But I have promised I would select the best entries and thus the best I must select.

Criteria and Overview
For purposes of the contest I stipulated dungeon adventures of 23-30 rooms (with a clarification that this room limit may be exceeded somewhat and that the point is mainly to avoid mörk bork micro-dungeon slop), using only monsters and items from the official sources (DMG, UA etc. etc.) with the addition of A SINGLE NEW ITEM AND MONSTER. Contestants were graded on both style and substance, creativity, adherence to the letter and spirit of the competition and my personal blood-alcohol levels at the time of the adjudication.

The object of the exercise was to stimulate people to figure out how to make an engaging, interesting and fun dungeon without resorting to the sort of surface creativity that has become a crutch in OSR, and especially Artpunk, circles.

I was very pleased with the results. You soared to the challenge. I saw dungeon maps that were partially submerged, interesting use of verticality, ambitious multi-level designs, and sophisticated orders of battle. I witnessed high-fantasy, sword-and-sorcery, science fantasy and faery tales. I witnessed strange elements, trials of champions, crystals that turned back the flow of time, devices that fed on the hearts of stars. Adventures that carried one into sewers, tombs, enchanted caverns, necropolis, decaying palaces and onto the front porch of hell itself. I witnessed faction play, clever use of encounters, natural hazards, illusions.  Prose that elevated these well-worn Gygaxian building blocks, blew away the patina of 30 years of pop-culture dilution, and displayed them in their full platonic glory.

Almost every school of DnD was represented: OD&D, High AD&D, 2e, RC, Old B/X, Newschool Fusion Convert, NuOSR, Unbalaced Dice Games. 19 Brave Knights raised their swords and said unto the Artpunkmen, ‘here and no further!’ This communal effort is the true spirit of DnD. So what if you are a gorgeous raven-haired nubile young desert woman from Asia Minor with skin like cream, and a look of desperate yearning dances across your aquiline features and you purse your full lips as your hazel eyes devour my reviews, imagining that perhaps I shall carry you away from your tent in the freezing night, and take you to some far-off crusader state to be my war-bride? I don’t mind that at all. That’s what DnD is all about!

In celebration of your overall performance, and since even many of the rejected entries far surpass in quality the average quality of an OSR contribution, I have already decided that I WILL PUBLISH A SECOND VOLUME of No ArtPunk, entitled No Artpunk Companion combining therein all the entries that were not included in the first volume. The procedures behind this we can discuss later.

On a last, more sobering note, one of the contestants, the author of the Long Hall, decided to withdraw his work from the final selection, citing he was not pleased with the quality. I attempted to dissuade him but he remained adamant. Should mr Vance wish to re-instate his entry, I will of course be quite happy to include his entry in No Artpunk Companion.

It is time to declare the winners.

The 8 Winners of the No-Artpunk competition.

As stated previously, you made it all but impossible for me to make a choice, but here are the ones that I deemed to be most worthy. If I had not decided to publish the rest, I might have extended the number of entries to 10 or more, as many entries beyond the 8^th are indeed still very much worth playing. In no particular order.

The Temple of Hypnos – I knew it would make top 8 when I reviewed it. Fantastic S&S vibe permeates the entire work, combined with a dynamic location where you can either opt for a (difficult) frontal assault or attempt a ruse ah la D2, everything in it reeks of craftsmanship, energy and style.
The Well – I am going to get scraped from Settembrini’s Christmas list, but somewhere halfway into The Well if fell in love with its gorgeous maps, its seamless atmosphere of rustic heroism, its ancient location holding many secrets etc. You can take the man from the 2e but you can’t take the 2e from the man. Strip off the OSE nonsense and just do a 2e version already.
City of Bats – A dazzling homage to Shrine of Toamachan without falling into knock-off territory, infusing each encounter with mythic potency. Great use of encounters. It feels mythic. Also fucking mummies with spitting cobras in them!!!
Tower of the Time Master – An open-ended heist adventure rife with possibilities of temporal fuckery. Unconventional and ambitious.
Vault of the Warlord – So polished it could essentially be released to the public, Vault has and does it all, town with intrigue, wilderness area, hidden information, a giant beaver dam, tomb, tricky custom encounters, rival npc parties, talking fucking swords etc.
Melonath Falls – The most advanced humanoid lair assault I have ever seen since GD. A gigantic tour de force, dozens and dozens of humanoids, verticality, partially submerged caverns, prisoners, ancient shrines to a river god etc. etc. Very Advanced D&D.
Caught in the Web of Past and Present – An enchanted palace, a respite for the weary, now taken over by decay and evil. Transformations, illusions, riddles, Shape-changing spiders, secrets AND DEATH in this coke-fuelled Faery-Palace of Evil and Enchantment.
Dust & Stars – The last choice was the most difficult, and ended with a toss-up between this one and Warlock Tower. I ended up going with Dust & Stars because of the strength of its concept, its ambition, the way it was implemented and the dynamic potential of the Star Pump, which all works delightfully.

Honourable Mention: Sword & Sewercery – Missing random encounter table be damned, Sword & Sewercery is the little engine that could, so many ideas are combined in such a light format and the whole is so in line with what I wanted from the contest that I want to give it some room in the spotlight. If I had not decided to publish the remainder in a separate volume I would have included it here. If you do not already have one, please take a complimentary PDF copy of Palace of Unquiet Repose.


The Winner and the Runner-UP. The No Artpunk King and the No Artpunk Shogun. The Best of the Best.

Once again the choice is heartrending, it could have easily been any one of 6 top entries.  When I look at them in terms of a seamless whole, what entry best combines useability, atmosphere, polish, tactical complexity, richness, variety, interaction and FANTASY I am left with no recourse but to award CAUGHT IN THE WEB OF PAST AND PRESENT by Chomy the First Prize in the PrinceofNothingPresents No-Artpunk competition. I don’t know if its something in the Goulash, but I was blown away by the overall quality of the piece. Great job. A POD + PDF copy of Palace (deluxe edition) will be awarded to you, the valiant and deserving Champion.

Breathing down the neck of Web of Past & Present is a great beast. As though it slumbered in the ice for 40 years and had now emerged, roaring with primordial fury, I award second prize to Melonath Falls by Trent. Absorbing its every nuance would be nothing less than a heroic feat, worthy of a veteran DM, but in terms of tactical complexity, dynamic environment, variety and sheer richness this one is a delight. I don’t know if it will be run by every starry-eyed youngster that gets his hands on No Artpunk, but I do know that those heroic few will have an awesome time. I award thee a PDF version of Palace of Unquiet Repose (Deluxe Edition).   

Whats nex?.
I have two compilations to assemble. There are a couple of courses of action open to us.

For the Winners (all 8 of them).

Congratulations! You are all worthy heroes. It will take me a while to assemble everything so you have until October 15^th to send me the following.

* If so desired, a revision or final edit. This is not required (and probably not recommended if you won).
* If so desired, a short piece, no more than half a page, on why you joined, who you are and anything else that you want to share so I can preface it.  

For the Contestants (the rest)

If you were among the contestants and you would like to see your work published in the No Artpunk Companion, I would be thrilled to do so. The same applies.

* If so desired, a revision or final edit. This is not a requirement.
* If so desired, a short piece, no more than half a page, on why you joined, who you are and anything else that you want to share so I can preface it.  
* If you don’t want to be part of No Artpunk Companion, please let me know via email (although you really should, you did a great job!).  
* Proceeds also go to Charity.

It might be longer until I release No Artpunk Companion, so you have some time to do any sort of re-edit or tinkering in the meantime.
 
My congratulations to the winners, my salutations to all of the contestants and a fine weekend to all of you. Updates r.e. No Artpunk will follow.

Glory to the Everlasting OSR! See you all soon.
Prince

UPDATE: Added some links so it would be easier to navigate for people that have not been reading along after translating feedback from a hungarian rpg forum.

UPDATE: Prizes will be mailed out soon. Sorting out the charity stuff with Malrex.